the one of a kind feeling

' i don't mind not having a place to stay, don't mind not getting a job, don't mind having no money.. and i don't mind having illness.. but losing her.. it's bad'

i met with a friend the other day and he told me this. it was so sad to see him like this, he said her gf was dealing with a lot of pressures and that she can't balance her life with him. i didn't know what to say to him, sometimes love is ironic, people in love and make all kinds of vows at times when they are in love and before you know it, they are merely words that people say at the spurs of the moment. it's not that they are lies, but just words came out at that moment, and the feelings at that moment was true. like what we called 'double edge sword', these words that are once so beautiful might end up the ones that hurt most some day.

and love, some kinda sick feeling which at times you don't even realize you're feeling it. like this very funny story nor told me. there's this guy who'd been chasing this girl for the longest time, like 2 years? the girl had always been rejecting him ever since till one day he decided to give up. the funniest thing is, the girl finally feels empty and realize that she has feeling for him and they ended up together. haha.

there is this gf of mine who was 2 timing her bf, one back home and one here. i wasn't very happy knowing what she was doing, but in the end, she chose to end her fling. she was worried that the fling partner might have an emotional break down as he always show his emotional self to her, but i told her guys like this don't feel as bad as she thinks. and true enough now the fling partner is dating another girl and she was left feeling disappointed and guilty when faced with her long time bf.

and another thing i notice, some couple which last very long, some are merely just out of habit. a friend once told me, she took one whole year mourning over her 2 year relationship thinking she couldn't live without him. but it was really just a feeling. nobody is supposed to can't live without somebody else can they? and when a relationship always has encounter breakups, it really means that there is something wrong with the relationship but due to habits, couples often stick together.

then there's this very 'unique' sick characteristic some guy may possess. haha. this comes from a good-husband-material guy, he said that a good guy who genuine care for a girl WILL not come in between she and her bf unless he knows that her bf wasn't treating her right. and a guy who did that, no matter how sincere or how emotional he appears to be, it is just some sick strategies to win a girl over to feed his ego. a guy like this will keep pestering until when the girl finally gave in, he'd leave seeing that she's no more challenge to him.

i used to be very puzzled when i heard of guys being very flower hearted when girls are always the victims in the relationship as i always heard stories about guys chasing over girls and girls dumping guys and read about love novels that guys are so fantastic and loyal lover during my secondary years. dun u just miss seeing those guys who are always trying to act machos and emo to protect the girls?? haha. was i so very wrong! so i attribute this to 2 reasons. one being guys change when they grew older and realize that girls are not as precious as they thought. second is, guys have harder hearts and girls tend to feel too much.

and finally girls are probably one of the most stupid beings when they are flattered. every girl likes to flattered, admit it or not, it boosts confidence in us. when a girl stay in a relationship for too long, she tends to feel bored and forgets how much she loves her guy and easily strayed when she is flattered by some other guy when her bf does not. when a guy is in love, really in love, he wouldn't stray that easily which then means he will have an extra high tolerance towards the girl. but i guess this paragraph is just some weak observations cos i never heard of stories otherwise.

ok.. haha.. i'm in mood for essay today, probably because i didn't write too well for my HR paper! GRrrrrr..